I’ve heard it my whole life, in fact I’ve dealt with it also. Too many men always use the phrase, “you can look, but you can’t touch.” What harm is there in that, right? Well, when one considers how the blood operates the brain and then how the soul is in the blood, indeed Jesus’s words about lusting after a woman is the same as committing adultery, rings true.
Men can’t help it, at least not most men, right? Countless men seem to have this problem, even amongst Believers. What does the Holy Scriptures say about such a notion?
“And everyone who competes for the prize controls himself in all things. Now they do it to obtain a perishable crown, but we an imperishable.” 1st Corinthians 9:25
The key here is ‘controls himself in all things.’ What does the bible say about people without self control?
“For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection, unyielding, slanderers, without self-control, savage, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away.” 2nd Timothy 3:2-5
This is not to say that a Believer can not commit iniquity in these matters, but it should not be so.
“But sexual perversion and all uncleanness or covetousness, let it not even be named among you, as is fitting for saints…” Ephesians 5:3
The problem here is that God has given men (and women) a solution to these sorts of problems in the Holy Scriptures. Simply following the Bible, while walking in the Spirit, should suffice for a Believer. Why are these things not mentioned in churches nowadays? The solution is quite simple:
“For I wish that all men were even as myself. But each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that. But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to be on fire.” 1st Corinthians 7:7-9
The problem for many men go deeper than even that. They get married and suddenly find that their wife, with whom God has made them one flesh (Mark 10:8), is still not ‘good’ enough for them. They forget:
“Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice with the wife of your youth…” Proverbs 5:18 (Read all of chapter 5 for yourself.)
“Look on life with the wife whom you love all the days of your vain life, which He has given you under the sun, all the days of your vanity. For that is your share in this life, and in your labor which you labor under the sun.” Ecclesiastes 9:9
Perhaps in these cases the real problem lies with not paying attention or taking heart the following verses:
“The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except by agreement for a time, that you may be free for fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” 1st Corinthians 7:4-5